Old photos

Me at fifteen with my best friend at the time. She later unfriended me so she could become friends with people even weirder than I was. One of them also said that I had an imaginary friend so it freaked her out. High school was not very awesome to me.


After viewing several old photo albums I received an objective lesson that I may not have had otherwise.

I'd rather spare you all with the details of my personal issues and I am not sure who reads this blog. I don't care who does, I hope that people do read my total nonsense + poetry. But sometimes I am certain that there are people just looking for their jollies to be filled when they find out that me and my melancholic entries are revolving every day. Fortunately, that's just how I write and the reality of my life is never going to be experienced by another human being except myself.

Now, on to more embarrassing photos for everyone's entertainment (and my own).


Me at age fifteen or sixteen. I spent quite a bit of my free time dressing really fucking bad and taking pictures of it. I was weird, antisocial and lived in St. Joseph, Missouri. What else was I going to do?
This is when I was eighteen, I believe, after I moved out of my parents' house and to college. I got a facial piercing, ratted my hair and started yelling drunken obscenities at people during parties. My fashion got a teensy bit better but was still terrible. I believe at this point in time I was yelling something bitchy at this guy who had a huge crush on me and couldn't leave me alone after that one time when I made out with him during the Colbert Report.

This is also me at eighteen taking a drag off of my first cigarette. That was recorded because everyone thought it was hilarious. My boyfriend at the time was so shocked, if I remember correctly. We broke up soon afterward. But it wasn't the cigarette.



It's funny how I cannot relate to any of these people (me) like I could when I was them. I mean, they are still in me, but I am just improved in the slightest. There is something to respect in all of them but I can't imagine actually going back there. The past is weird. I am really ready to move on to better things. I just feel like I am stuck in a stagnant pace, like I am meant to keep reviewing over and over and over and knowing every mistake that I have made and why things happened the way they have. Because very little, if anything, just happens for no reason. I have not been able to drop it because I have not deserved to do so. But I am ready when that time comes.

I'm going to be posting these entries more often. I have so many of these pictures that I have to share.